My Super Official 🍕 Rating System Explained

Have you seen the ratings at the top of each of my pizza reviews? Well I have them, and here's a little more background on the super official pizza rating system:

🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕 = 5/5 You're AMAZING! The highest rating a pizza place can receive in my book (unless it beats out my Rome experience - see below- for which it will receive MORE than a 5 🍕 rating!)

🍕🍕🍕🍕 = 4/5 Great, but not THE Greatest. An overall excellent experience. Not many places receive 5 🍕 (not everyone is perfect), so this is still a coveted rating. 

🍕🍕🍕 = 3/5 You're Average. No one likes to be called a Basic B, but sometimes, you just are one. Whether the pizza was underwhelming or there wasn't really something over the top to rave about, you did the bare minimum.

🍕🍕 = 2/5 Subpar. Somethings not right here and it's likely the pizza or maybe the service, or even worse both. Yikes.

🍕 = 1/5 NO, just no. My lowest rating (you can't earn zero 🍕, unless you don't serve pizza), You really have to be a bad parlor or restaurant to screw up this bad. Something is WAY off, and you should probably look into why your pizza is so terrible. 

It take a lot of dedication to test all of this pizza...

but someone has to do it right?

How did I come up with the EEAP (Elisa Eats a Pizza) rating system? How does one score lower or higher than another? I know you are dying to find out, so let me explain:

There’s currently only one pizza place in the world that I would rank higher than a 5. The place was a little hole in the wall right by the Coliseum in Italy. First, most pizza in Italy is to die for because, well, it’s Italy. But second, this slice was so simplistic, so fresh, I’ll never forget it. Sitting on a bench by ancient ruins and enjoying one of the best slices of my life is an unforgettable experience. 

Proof..I wrote everyday about my European travels and I found this excerpt about the Colosseum pizza!

However, it was almost ten years ago when I backpacked through Europe with my college roommate and being a freshly graduated college student, I didn’t take note of places we ate (although I apparently did from the evidence above), I simply remember it was pizza, it was cheap, and it was really, really good.

So, the pizza paradise parlor will remain a mystery until I can travel back to Rome to find pizza heaven once again. It might seem silly that I’m holding this pizza up as the holy grail when it was almost ten years ago, I don’t have a picture (without one it didn’t happen, right?), and I don’t know the name of the joint, but, this is my starting place for a top-rated pizza. Trust me, if I taste one better, I’ll let you know.

You are so beautiful to me..

Now we have the top-rated standard, what about the lower numbers? Most reviews will range from a 🍕🍕🍕 (three) to a 🍕🍕🍕🍕 (four), I’m not sure I’ve been to a one-star pizza place (I probably have but erased it from my memory), so hopefully, there will not be too many of those. However, this is a blog, so I’m not going to hold back any thoughts when it comes to my reviews, especially if it could save another cheesy soul time and money on bad dough. 

I’ll deduct points for mainly the taste of the pie (dough, cheese, overall flavor, toppings, etc.) but sometimes if I have a really bad experience, I’ll also deduct points for service. Eating pizza should always be enjoyable and I believe all restaurants or even tiny joints can make that experience better by the way they treat a customer. 

So, there you have it. The E.E.A.P. rating system explained. I can tell it really blew your mind. I know, it’s a very complex process I go through to get the rating at the top of the page.

Let’s stop talking numbers and get back to eating, shall we?